I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
