Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
What kind of scumbag goes to a baby's 1st birthday party with a black eye? This kind. Me. I'm disgraceful.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
