I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Randomize
