lets start a swedish sibling band together
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
Randomize
