i just google imaged poop.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
