no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
