My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
