She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
I'm going to have to take an awkward trip to the front desk to ask them if they found a pair of turquoise shorts and an "I'm the Mom" sweatshirt.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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