Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
