i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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