I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
