My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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