Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
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