She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize
