Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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