Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
