It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
