I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
