she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
