You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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