It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
