I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
my mouth is as dry as a post-menopausal camel on antidepressant's vagina.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I have already put on my inside pants.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
