That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize