No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
I have tasted many bathrooms
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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