I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
