the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
