he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
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