i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Randomize