That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
