I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
my life is like one bad, slutty lifetime movie.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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