This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
