apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Randomize
