Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
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