I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize