Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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