we have officially lost it.
so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Randomize
