This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Randomize
