using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Randomize
