can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Randomize
