I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
You're so nebulous sometimes
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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