you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
Randomize
