so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
Do I get bonus points if I get lockjaw after a cosmic blowjob?
Is this like a preordered booty call?
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
