I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I told the cop it was my birthday and he said "happy fuckin birthday", handcuffed me and threw me in the back of the cop car.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
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