put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
