So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
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