Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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