You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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