you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
