I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
