You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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