Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Randomize
