I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
